how things change

This morning at Boot Camp I was a complainer. John kicked our butts with arms and mine were feeling like they were going to fall off of my body. This should prove itself perfect for tomorrow when I have to lift them to cut hair!!! I'm choosing not to complain anymore because it really doesn't help. Breathing helps. Positive thought patterns help. I do this when I run. I say to myself when I'm getting tired, "you are a strong runner" and it helps.

I talked to John extensively today about changing the shape of parts of my body. The pique in my curiosity came from pictures I took of myself this past weekend. I am loving how my body is changing shape and losing inches, but I found frustration is some specific areas. These being my upper legs, hips and buttox region as well as my upper arms, shoulder, back of the upper arm area. What I find different about this, is that my thinking is starting to change shape as well. I am interested in specific areas. This means, I'm looking at my body in different ways. For some reason it means in my mind that I'm already into I run, I bike, I swim, I do Boot Camp, and now I want to tone specific parts. This shift is like this article my mentor sent to me about the Observing Ego(part is posted below).
It says to me that my thoughts on working out are that I just do that. It's become part of me. But, within that working out, I want to increase things...change things, get down to the nitty gritty, have an opinion about it. I'm over the hump of going to the gym, at least that beginning hump of just go everyday hump. Does this make sense or am I just poetically waxing again? Read the article below and see if you agree.

It's pretty cool that it's not just the outsides that are changing this summer, but the insides as well. It's that WHOLE person idea. And I'm loving it! so, no more complaining!!!!

Without changing our patterns of thought, we will not be able to solve the problems that we created with our current patterns of thought. –Albert Einstein


If we don’t change direction soon we’ll end up where we’re going. –Irwin Corey


The range of what we think and do is limited by what we fail to notice. And because we fail to notice that we fail to notice there is little we can do to change until we notice how failing to notice shapes our thoughts and deeds. -Daniel Goleman


One of the hallmarks of maturity in humans is what is called an "observing ego." The word "ego" means "I", so the observing ego is the "I who watches me." It is the ability to observe yourself and notice how you are doing. People who are strong in this area have the ability to make better judgments, regulate their impulses, monitor their tone as they talk to someone, notice whether that last idea was nutty or not, change direction, and sometimes remember, "I had better keep that thought to myself." It is like having a coach, a chaperone, an instructor, and a cop all inside your head. If you have ever known someone who lacks this ability, you have likely asked them, "What were you thinking?!" In reality, they were thinking - but were probably not thinking about their thinking. Nor were they thinking about their behaviors and choices. They lacked oversight.


Without this oversight, a person is on autopilot, led more by impulses, needs, fears, and immaturity, than by superior capacities such as wisdom, knowledge, courage, experience, and prudence. The biggest problem is that, without self-observation, people don't notice their mistakes and patterns. They continue to make the same mistakes and get the same results. In order to change, observation is necessary, and can be provided at first by an external force (a coach, counselor, friend, or even a parole officer). Over time, the observation becomes internalized, and the ability to self-monitor and adjust when needed is developed. That is when we know that maturity is becoming an option. No more "home alone."